endings and beginnings

i'm just an ordinary girl. i fill my days with school and pictures while continuously daydreaming. most of the time i dream so loud there's tingling and numbness crawling to the back of my head. my eyes become blurry and i forget where i am. it's a nice feeling, but i always miss my stops.

i've been dreaming of things for so long that now, they're finally happening. as if i pushed them out of my mind and they fell into reality. luckily, they didn't get lost. and even if they did, they certainly aren't as lost as i am now.

when you've lived your whole life inside a bubble it's hard to get out. the older you get, the thicker the bubble becomes and the tougher it is to escape it. of course, there's always going be people who'll never get out of it or even know they're in one, but that's not going to be me. i want to push myself out of it as much as i can and not care where i'll fall.

this fall i'm going to college and i only have few days for so many choices. is it britain or the states? film, photography or both? boyfriend or no boyfriend? for those who don't know – yes, I do have a boyfriend. we've been together for almost two years (may is so close!) and happy. he's so much like me. not a photographer but an artist of his own passion, physics. together, we make-up spiderman except we're not saving lives, yet.

life feels confusing right now, but i'd rather have it this way than to be back in the old routine. all I know is i want to be happy, create and him. whether that's going to happen or not i'll know in few more days and then few more months.


t,m

p.s – push yourself out of your bubbles. do it while you still can and make sure you don't get caught in others again.


7 comments:

  1. i following your artwork and your blog for awhile now. and this post came at a time where my problem with my very own bubble never was bigger.
    so your post let me think about some things.

    thank you!

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  2. i hope you will get out of your bubble and make the best of it :) i am sure you will make the right decisions.

    ps: i love that picture!

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  3. 'all I know is i want to be happy, create and him.'

    seems to me that's all you need to know (:

    (rosabel)

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  4. Aproape ca m-ai facut sa plang....iti doresc sa iei cea mai buna decizie, indiferent care va fi aia....pacat e ca inima spune altceva decat capul....dar va fi bine :)
    Destinul ti-e scris demult...tu doar il urmezi

    Cu drag,
    Alexandra

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  5. yep couldn't have worded it better myself. I've been coming to terms with the same things recently and now after 18 years of life finally understand why my head was like a big confusing storm the whole time. It feels so good to step out of the bubble!
    Thank you for this post :)

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  6. cuvinte mari pentru un artist mare.. daca eu ma pricep la desen, miti.. tu stii ca faci arta din scris.
    sincer ma simt ca un analfabet. Eu nu ajung la profunzimea asta nici in romana. textul tau, scris in varianta mea suna cam asa: "i'm in a bubble.."

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